You know you never know what life is going to bring you.
Well,,,,that's obvious. But, how you deal with it is a different number all together. I was telling a friend the other day when she said something about someone acting a certain way that she didn't particularly like her comment. You just never know what her life has been like or what that person is going through at that time.
Compassion.
Does going through tough times give us the right to act however we choose though? I doubt it. It does however require people to give you a break.
I'll use myself as an example.
I've done and said some crazy things lately...is that okay? No it's not, but I believe that people have compassion and forgiveness in their heart. I like to think I'm one of those. I don't hold grudges. I really don't. I learned that lesson from my mother. I just move on down the road and forget. I mean, what can you do to change bad behavior? You can walk away from it if you'd like. You can be mean as heck and teach that person a lesson. And maybe that's the answer? Yep teach that person a lesson. Put em through Hell. Or you can choose to forgive. I love forgiveness, just like my blog yesterday. A healer.
People say "I'm sorry" all the time. Ya know, it just runs outta their mouth. I'll never forget someone I used to know would do bad things and just say "I'm sorry" and think it's okay. I mean just say it, without really meaning it. It's not okay,,,,you have to really be sorry for that act. But how much can you say I'm sorry and really, really mean it without that person believing you? I guess forever.
Forgiveness.....
Something warm and compassionate happened yesterday to Sister and me. We went to White Flowers here in Birmingham to buy a gown for mother to be buried in. Sister went straight to a gown that had printed on it a bed with 4 angels surrounding it. We both sat there and sobbed. It was perfect. We went to purchase it with both of us sobbing. I explained to the sweet owner what we were buying it for and why we were both so upset. She gave us the gown as a gift.
Something warm and compassionate happened yesterday to Sister and me. We went to White Flowers here in Birmingham to buy a gown for mother to be buried in. Sister went straight to a gown that had printed on it a bed with 4 angels surrounding it. We both sat there and sobbed. It was perfect. We went to purchase it with both of us sobbing. I explained to the sweet owner what we were buying it for and why we were both so upset. She gave us the gown as a gift.
Compassion.
We have had the most compassionate nurses I've ever been around in my life. They have cried with me, they've held me, they've loved on me and on my family. Not to mention the unbelievable love and attention they've given my mom through this journey.
She's still breathing. We are still waiting for her to "pack up her luggage" and take the ride home as one wonderful nurse put it.
Thank you for reading guys,
and remember to have compassion for someone you love today.
xo
kb
Beautifully written:) There is so much input I have with both of your last two journals but it would be a blog of it's own:) Let's just say I think you've written them both (and all your others) for us all to think about.) Thanks Kendall...and for a word about White Flowers....I haven't been there in a LONG time. Usually stay in my area if I"m not traveling South:) BUT..Jess's 2nd grade teacher's wife and her friend opened the store LONG LONG ago. Jess was in 2nd grade:) A very well respected young couple (they were young then...and I always look at young folks as still young, even many years later:)) And so very kind, sweet and COMPASSIONATE, and BELIEVERS....that you definitely knew by the way they lived:) SO..if it wasn't her, then I"m not surprised that those working for them have the same kind of heart.:) Don't stop writing:)
ReplyDeleteI`m going to really,really try! the older I get the more compassionate I am!!! I love you and I am so sorry for your pain. I wish I could help you, but you are the one that is helping me!!!
ReplyDeleteAunt Ellen
This waiting is so hard....but don't think that she isn't aware. She knows and she is giving you all time to be able to do this. She will know when it is time. She will be whole and healthy again, and she will know that you are going to live your lives fully and teach your children and grandchildren as she taught you. That will be her joy. Forgiveness, Compassion... add love, and what more can be given? See how much you have learned from her. What a proud mother she is! And...at this time, you are giving all of us these things to consider; these things that she taught you. And so, in your blogs, you lift her up and share her with us! Another full circle. I pray every day that I may be given words to say what you may need. I have written twice before; once about giving up my father, and I will continue as long as long as the words are given! Since there seem to be several 'anonymous' ones, I will be A2 and it will be more a more personal connection! Don't forget that Time will give you the good memories and your joy will come back as well. A2
ReplyDeleteI also wrote in a past posts about my father and his death (disc disease, thoughts about siblings). Being a nurse years ago (not practiced in 20+ years) it thrills me to read that they are being utterances of God to you and your Mom. That is biblical, the very word used in my Bible. We are to be utterances of God to others. I believe that in the middle of these hard times God is present and you have to be aware to realize it is Him. I believe that the woman in White Flowers was a gift from God to you also. His word says every good gift is from Him. How wonderful He is to walk so close these heartache days and for you to feel and recognize His presence. Kendall, as a nurse I learned that your hearing is the last to go. Keep talking to your Mom even though she cannot respond. I used that unresponsive, yet still earthly time, when my father was in that transition to tell him all the things I could. Not that he or your Mom don't (didn't) know our hearts and how much we loved them, I just wanted nothing unsaid. Those words I shared gave me great comfort in the days ahead. I am sorry you are joining a club that no one understands until they walk it. It taught me great lessons. An example that immediately comes to mind is, I use to think that I would not be missed at a funeral, I guess I thought myself unimportant. How wrong I was when experiencing life from the other end. Those who sent cards and attended family funerals to this day hold a special place in my heart. I can't remember what they said or did but they were there. Now I am there. Now I take the time to jot a quick note. Now I send I note a month later when all the meals,etc. have died down. The hurt and missing was still there even when the world had gone back to business as usual. Kendall I end this today to say how proud I am of you. Not that you even care, but to give you encouragement that you are keeping your heart soft in the midst of such pain as evidenced by your blog titles. Praying this morning was for peace and patience because our timing is not always His. I pray for your sweet Momma and that she not be aware of the pain she is in. I pray that all you come in contact with in the hospital meet her/your needs with great compassion and intuitiveness. On a lighter note, I thought about being A1, since I was in that position above the previous Anonmymous poster on a earlier day, but somehow all I can think of is the steak sauce! I guess I will be Saucer Sister....... that a story for another post comment.
ReplyDeleteyou are a wonderful sauce to my steak!!! (which I love by the way!)
ReplyDeletethank you for your sweet, compassionate words!
xo
kb
Kendall---my heart aches for you. your words touch my heart and bring tears streaming down my face. I am so sorry that you're going through this inevitable life change, one that I dread with every ounce of my being. You are handling it with such grace and honesty; being a wonderful witness to others through your faith in the Lord through it all. Thank you for sharing with us as you get your daily therapy :) Please know I'm here for you and your family if you need anything...meal, etc. I'll lift you all up in prayers as you through this transition and your mama packs up her luggage...love, TAY
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